I Spanked a Stranger, and I Liked It

Anorexic, I ain't. In fact, I should bend on dimpled knee and beg Bob Harper to whip my atomic ass into a shape other than round. But I don't really feel like doing that right now because I'm cool with who I am. After all, my personality is pretty banging, and I've been seeing a therapist for a year now to help me cope with the fact that my mom called me on my birthday and offered to pay to send me to The Biggest Loser Resort as a gift. With Prozac's help, I've learned to find the story more

My Vagina Is On a Diet, And It Would Appreciate It If You Stopped Offering It Cake

Apparently, my vagina is hungry for more than mere man flesh, and according to the Internet, my honey pot's cravings for chocolate and Cheetos means that I am no longer desirable down there. All my life, I've been reasonably satisfied with my wahoo. I mean, I never entered it into a beauty pageant or anything, but the last time I checked, it seemed adequate. Fortunately, Pinterest sensed I was being naive about my corpulent copulater and remedied the situation by suggesting that I read the health article, "How to Lose Weight in the Pubic Area." Mind. Blown. Without that news